I used to love running around the crazy mirrored room at the show, you know the one’s that made you short, tall, fat, thin, rubbery and everything in between. From memory there was even one that was the real you but I never spent much time in front of that one. A recent client reminded me of these mirrors when she began to tell me how she saw herself, she had a distorted self image and was really very hard on herself.
It’s a strange thing, most people think it’s wrong to judge others, but when it comes to themselves they have no problems at all. And so often, the judgement they make is really harsh. If you think about some of your negative self talk and then repeat it out loud using another person’s name, would you even repeat it? When I repeated back to my client what she’d said about herself and put another person’s name in front of the statement she was horrified. Admitting that we’re not that nice to ourselves can be quite confronting, the good news is it is something we can all change.
So why do a large percentage of the population have such a poor view of themselves? You don’t have to look very far for the answer. The media and the fashion industry set standards that are virtually impossible to meet, a Size 6 is now considered a Plus Size for a female model on the runway. And, half of all women wear a size 14 or larger. A teenage girl comparing herself to these models is like comparing apples and oranges, it’s just not right but she doesn’t know that and from a very young age she has set herself up in her mind as a failure as overweight and therefore unattractive.
One of the keys here is not to compare yourself to the models you see in the media. Sure it can be beneficial as a visual aid, but not as a definitive measure. The mere act of comparing causes unnecessary stress and pain. So why do it? Why not set your own goals and work towards them.
Next time you stand in front of the mirror or catch a glimpse of yourself in a shop window, rather than focus on the negatives, focus on the positives and you’ll notice a huge difference. You’ll feel like skipping around rather than dragging yourself around.
Skipping it is for me, I know and acknowledge I’ve got a few flaws but that’s half the fun, and partly what keeps me moving. I’m looking forward to catching that next glimpse of myself, and when I do I’ll be smiling. Life is great, I hope you think so too. Sweet dreams xx